Why Taking Time for Yourself is Important – Learning to Love Yourself

How are you today?

No, REALLY, how are you?

Have you thought about how you’re doing at all today and really inquired within yourself to see whether or not you’re ok?

Of course, we hear the phrase “how are you” on a regular basis, and generally we just kind of gloss over the question with a generic “I’m fine how are you?”, to which the other person replies in a similar way.

But how many of us actually ponder the question deeply enough to get a genuine answer?

Generally speaking in the busy lives we lead these days, it’s all about what the WORLD needs first and we often put what WE need second, last, or often times we don’t even consider what our needs are at all.

But why is this?

Why is it that we aren’t taught in our societies around the world the importance of self-care and of taking time for YOU and what your genuine needs are on a regular basis?

We’re experts in the area of how to take care of the needs of others, but isn’t it time we explored just exactly why taking time for yourself is important?

Are You Emotionally and Mentally Drained?

Have you ever felt DRAINED in your day to day life?

You know, either physically drained, emotionally drained, mentally drained, drained in one or more of your relationships, financially drained, or even SPIRITUALLY drained?

I’m sure you have at some point.

I know I have!

But have you noticed how we never really inquire as to WHY we are feeling so drained on a regular basis, and then DO something about it?

Do you think it’s normal for people to feel drained all the time?

Of course, we all know the remedy for when we are feeling PHYSICALLY drained.

We simply need more exercise, hydration, proper foods etc. as well as to cut out all the sugar and garbage from our diets!

But how do we recharge ourselves when we are feeling emotionally and mentally drained?

How do we recharge ourselves when we aren’t fundamentally HAPPY or fulfilled in our lives?

How to Truly Recharge: Taking Time for Yourself

I don’t know about YOU, but I think it’s time we as a human race started to slow down and take a minute or two for ourselves on a regular basis!

Many of us think the world is going to come to an end if we aren’t CONSTANTLY focused on the needs of the world and others in our lives, but the truth is, it WON’T!

And I think when we take this time for ourselves in order to recharge and get our inner needs met, we should start with simply asking ourselves how we’re doing and sort of taking a personal inventory of our true thoughts and feelings about our lives, where we currently are, as well as where we’re headed.

Questions to ask ourselves might be things like:

Are you feeling loved and appreciated in your life?

Are you feeling ignored and under-appreciated?

Are you happy, sad, angry, or depressed?

Honestly just taking some time to ask yourself how you’re doing can go a long way in making sure that you are getting your inner needs met and are thus recharging yourself emotionally.

If you have familiarized yourself with the Being Tree model here on The Whole Life Solution site or have heard me talking about it somewhere, you know that I view our inner self as if it were like a living breathing tree.

And this tree, just like all other trees, plants, and life forms, needs care and attention on a daily basis to make sure that it is healthy and thriving.

Taking care of our inner self is no different from taking care of a tree, a plant, or a whole garden.

Taking Time for Yourself is Exercising Self Compassion

Many in the mental health field are beginning to realize that the best way to go about taking care of our inner needs is through practicing self-compassion.

Self-compassion is self-love.

And by loving ourselves we are getting our inner needs met.

Giving ourselves love and compassion is JUST like watering and taking care of a tree, and in this case our inner Being Trees!

Practicing self-love and self-compassion also entails making a commitment to yourself that you are going to take the time daily to check in with yourself and see how you’re doing, to see what your inner needs are, and then to make sure that you actually get those needs met.

Self-compassion includes loving yourself the way your mother or father would internally.

It’s about how we think to ourselves about ourselves.

It’s about how we see ourselves and talk to ourselves.

It’s about being understanding and forgiving with ourselves when we fall short of our own expectations.

It’s about allowing ourselves to be seen and heard, even if it’s just with our own self and something like a pad of paper and a pen.

It’s allowing our emotional pain to come to the surface to be looked at and healed.

It’s about allowing ourselves to be our most vulnerable, authentic, genuine selves both with ourselves as well as with others.

It’s making sure we are getting plenty of exercise, water, and the right kinds of foods on a regular basis.

Honestly, self-compassion and self-love encompass EVERY area of our being:  physical, mental, emotional, personal, financial, social, AND spiritual, and making sure we are getting our needs met in all of these areas.

Self Compassion is the Best Way to Get Your Inner Needs Met

If you’re stuck on just how exactly to go about getting your inner emotional needs met, just focus on practicing self-compassion.

Self-compassion in and of itself goes a long way to getting your emotional needs met.

In fact, it could be argued that self-love and self-compassion are all you really need in order to get your inner needs met.

By practicing self-love we are feeling the warmth, safety, and fulfillment that we crave in life.

You can start by noticing your habitual thought patterns as well as your inner self-dialogue to see how you are talking to yourself and treating yourself.

Many of us are constantly putting ourselves down and neglecting ourselves, thinking somehow that we are not important or worthy of attention, adoration, or love and so treat ourselves accordingly.

Once you’ve noticed how you talk to yourself and think to yourself on a regular basis, you can try stopping those negative thoughts and practicing more loving and compassionate thoughts with yourself.

Then if you’d like to go one step further, you can start writing down your negative or irrational thoughts that you have to yourself that might cause you some worry or anxiety, and then try to practice writing out positive, compassionate, rational thoughts to counter them.

By recognizing negative and destructive thoughts and then countering them with compassionate and loving thoughts, especially through writing them down, you are rewiring your brain to start being more loving and compassionate with yourself on a regular basis.

You’d be surprised how even just changing the way we think to ourselves and talk to ourselves can make all the difference in how much better we feel in general and to be able to heal emotionally whenever something happens that serves to bother us in some way.

Start Taking Time for Yourself Today

However you decide to start taking some time for yourself and getting your inner needs met, striving to take time for yourself and to start working on your inner needs is one of the most important and healthy things you can do for yourself in your life.

Even if you just take a few moments to calm your thoughts and meditate a little, or go for a walk, or even just think about what you’re thankful for and excited about in your life can be extremely helpful to your overall well-being and in getting your inner needs met.

This is how you’ll be able to recharge yourself when you’re feeling drained at the core level.

Doing these things may seem small and insignificant, but they will go a long way in making sure that your emotional needs are being met, that you are getting more out of life, AND that your energy is being restored to you.

Who knows, you might even find some genuine happiness and joy along the way that you can then share with the rest of the world!

Breathing air and exercise gets your blood flowing and oxygenates your blood cells.

Drinking water hydrates your system so your brain and body and function properly.

Eating food gives your body energy and fuel.

And loving yourself has a tendency to bring one joy and fulfillment.

Who knew finding inner peace and fulfillment could be so easy and was within our grasp all along?

Wrapping it Up

So to sum it all up:

  • Taking time for yourself is of the utmost importance for your overall health and well-being
  • Taking time for yourself on a regular basis is actually a form of practicing self-love and self-compassion
  • Practicing self love and self-compassion is the BEST way to go about getting your inner needs met and of recharging yourself when you’re feeling drained

It might be a bit of a challenge at first to try to start taking conscious time out of your day for yourself and in practicing self-love and self compassion with yourself, but it is SO worth it.

It was kind of strange for me at first because frankly I didn’t love myself at all as I grew up in a home where there was nothing but pain, anger, and suffering.

But once I DID start to get the hang of practicing self-love and self-compassion, EVERYTHING in my inner world shifted and I felt SO much better!

I PROMISE that if you start this simple yet powerful practice it will yield to you more joy and happiness than you could possibly imagine.

Over to you now:  do you struggle with things like anxiety and depression in your life?

Do you feel drained and sort of unseen and unheard in general in your life?

If so, do you think it’s possible you are simply not focused on getting your inner needs met and in practicing self-love and self-compassion?

On the other hand, maybe you HAVE or DO practice self-love and self-compassion.

In this case, what has your experience been like with this practice?

Either way, I’d love to hear your thoughts, feelings, and insights in the comments below!

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Be well.



Why Taking Time for Yourself is Important - Learning to Love Yourself

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Stacy Gallagher

    Self compassion is such a difficult thing to do. We push outward giving to activities and those around us often times negating our own needs in the process. I find for me that I long for my yoga and meditation sessions to turn off my mind and find quiet. It is in the quiet that I find rest. It is a hard lesson to think that the act of no thought will actually improve thought. I appreciate your message.

    1. Hi Stacey! I’m a yoga and meditation practitioner myself and find that it is unparalleled in being able to bring one within and give one some personal time to spend with themselves. It certainly seems as if the mind itself is the cause of all our troubles! Being able to quiet it and silence it altogether if one is able is definitely the ultimate in self compassion and in getting ones needs met. I appreciate your comment 🙂

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